Ah, domestic violence—a truly wonderful way to ruin a marriage, shatter a home, and make the neighbourhood collectively gasp in horror. One almost has to admire the audacity of it: taking the very institution God Himself blessed and turning it into a personal arena for rage, fear, and abuse. Because, of course, nothing says “holy matrimony” quite like fists, intimidation, and emotional torment.
Now, let’s imagine hearing about this in the context of a Christian marriage. You’ve spent years believing in covenant love, mutual submission, and the sacred call to reflect Christ in your home. You recite Ephesians 5:25 with your spouse and think, “Yes, this is how love is meant to be.” And then—oh joy—you learn that instead of emulating Christ, one of the partners is auditioning for a role in a crime drama titled “The Homefront Horror Show.” It’s the kind of news that makes you want to check the calendar: surely this can’t be happening in 2026, in a church-saturated, Scripture-quoting world.
But wait—there’s a special, uniquely grotesque twist when the perpetrator is a pastor. A custodian of God’s mystery, a supposed guardian of the flock, a human billboard for love, grace, and holiness. These are the very people entrusted to lead congregations in understanding God’s character, preaching reconciliation, and modeling Christlike behaviour. And yet, some of them choose to channel their “leadership skills” into control, intimidation, and violence behind closed doors. It’s the spiritual equivalent of a Michelin-star chef serving spoiled, rancid meat at a wedding banquet.
The irony is almost Shakespearean. The preacher of love becomes the peddler of pain. The one who teaches forgiveness turns the home into a classroom of terror. And the congregation? Left stunned, murmuring: “Surely this cannot be true. He’s a man of God… isn’t he?” Yes, precisely the point. That’s why it’s worse: domestic violence in a Christian home isn’t merely immoral—it’s sacrilegious. It mocks the very covenant God made with His people and the teachings that should illuminate every believer’s walk.
Domestic violence is never private; it’s a spiritual scandal, a moral abomination, and a tragedy that multiplies its consequences. When it comes from those meant to represent Christ, it’s not just a sin—it’s sacrilege with a megaphone, reverberating through the community and shaking faith itself. If ever there were a reason to demand accountability, justice, and radical reformation, this is it.
After all, the church can tolerate minor imperfections. It can even forgive mistakes. But there is no grace that sanctifies brutality, no sermon that redeems intimidation, no theology that can sugarcoat violence in the home. Domestic abuse is evil, it is vile, and it has no place—least of all behind the pulpit.
© February 18th, 2026
Pastor Emmanuel Obu
The Apostle of Joy
